Home?

Today I came (to what most people would call) home. I choose not to call it home as home should be a place where you can freely and happily be yourself. I grew up in a small northern remote community where homophobia, actually its more like divers-o-phobia (a phobia to everything non WASP) is the norm.

I know of too many incidents in this community where people have been physically, emotionally, and/or verbally assaulted due to their race, gender identity, or sexual orientation (perceived or actual). For myself, I had to deal with it for about 10 years, always knowing I'm different and always having that painfully made well aware to myself and everyone else. This is why where I grew up is not my home.

I struggle when people ask where my home is. Sometimes I just refer to the place I grew up in as my home as that is what most people consider it to be, it makes things easier. But really, I don't actually feel like I have a home. I have a small apartment in a semi-large city with my stuff in it, that's the closest thing to home I have.

Hate has made me feel this way. Hate has taken away something most everyone takes for granted, something which I struggle to put into words, I think its beyond the meanings of the word "home." When I die, there is no where I want to be buried. When I feel lonely, I have no where I wish I could go for comfort. When I miss my family, I don't miss "home." By the way, this lack of having a true "home" has almost nothing to do with my family. We love each other and me being gay just took a little time to adjust to.

Too many times I have left this town with a tire just as deflated as my sense of self and pride. I am, however, thankful the warranty on my tires cover acts of homophobia, it comes in handy. I only come here because I love my family and friends. It is truly a love/hate relationship.

I would love nothing more than to have somewhere to sincerely call home.

May 17: IDAHO (International Day Against HOmophobia and transphobia)

May 17 marks the International Day Against HOmophobia and transphobia (IDAHO). This year's theme is ‘End Transphobia: Respect Gender Identity,' which, right now, is particularly crucial for Alberta. This day has been chosen as it marks the anniversary of the day in 1990 when the World Health Organization removed homosexuality from its list of mental illnesses.

Countries all over the world will take part in this day through various initiatives which will make a strong impact on decision makers. One of these great initiatives is the IDAHO challenge by Gays.com and the Committee for the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia (see the video at the end of this post). Basically, as you will see, the idea is to step out in front of the camera and, in your own language, introduce yourself, state where you're from and how proud you are to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. I think its great, it will provide visibility to an otherwise invisible population.

Right now there are a few reasons why this day is of particular importance. Since December approximately sixty gay Iraqi's have been killed (BBC News). Very recently, the province of Alberta (Canada) has removed gender reassignment surgeries from the provincial budget, leaving the lives of many transgender people in uncertainty. The struggle for marriage equality in the United States. And, the fact that people experience homophobia everyday is reason enough for IDAHO.

The success of IDAHO depends on you and me, lets make it the best one to date! We can do this by getting involved in our communities and participating in projects like the IDAHO Challenge.

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." -- Margaret Mead

A person's well being can be removed from the budget

The province of Alberta disappointed me, yet again. As usual, it's sickening conservatism is at the root of this disgust. Usually its a combination of the red neck assholes and conservative government, but this time its solely the latter.

The 2009-10 budget was approved today, which unsurprisingly approved some cutbacks. Gender reassignment surgeries (GRS) are no longer covered, which will save about $700 000 a year–PENNIES in the big picture! They approved other things like a $550 million increase to other areas of health services. The GRS cut makes no sense.

From the view of humanity, you cannot put a price on someone's complete physical, mental, and social well being. If something as fundamental as gender and all its intricacies is no longer fully recognized and financially covered as a health issue, its going to wreak havoc on the lives of transgendered people. Trans people already experience maginalization and transphobia, the least the government could do is attempt to lessen it.

This also brings up the issue of gender identity disorder as defined by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual 4, used by mental health professionals. You can read exactly how transgenderism is medicalized in the DSM-IV here. The DSM is definitely flawed, for it deemed homosexuality an illness until 1973. This is also the exact reason why I am no longer a psychology major and have switched to sociology.

My heart goes out to a close friend of mine who is trans. I wish her the very best in these hard times. Times made hard by an ignorant government.

Day of Silence (we're not already silent enough?)

Tomorrow is the Day of Silence at my university. Everyone who supports and advocates GLBTQ acceptance and rights is asked to wear purple and remain silent for most of the day until a "breaking the silence" rally. The idea is to bring attention to GLBTQ bullying, harassment, and discrimination in schools and universities. However, as with anything I have a my three bucks to add to it.

The fact that we're doing something like this is great, especially in Alberta. I would just like to have seen better organization and promotion for the event (like how awesomely planned Make Poverty History's Stand event is planned). But this is the result of the conservatism of Alberta and widespread apathy both within and outside the GLBTQ community.

I've complained about apathy a few times, but really, its horrible. If the majority of students weren't so apathetic and actually voted for provincial and federal elections, I'm sure we would have more political attention. After all, most seniors vote and they receive a lot of attention. As the old adage goes, the squeaky wheel gets the oil. Everywhere us GLBTQ people need to be more squeaky, need to be visible more than a couple times a year, and need to be relentless in our pursuit for acceptance and full legal rights. Really, everyone who wants to see change or fight for a cause that's dear to them needs to do something about it--they need to get involved!

This is a great video on apathy and awareness. You CAN make a difference.


Here is part two.